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[bitemark]

the most open of posts
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[maskreant]

KURUSU AKIRA (22) Just a college student looking for a good time. Willing to try anything once. Treat me to coffee? ☕🐈

✓       ✕

a very reluctant/accidental/who-knows ✓

[fellow]

[ 'how did you'- delete delete delete. 'why am i'- delete. 'why did you match with me'- delete. ]

Kurusu-kun, you can't be that desperate for company.

[ implying that this is an app for loners. and honestly, 'looking for a good time?' goro doesn't even know why it's in his phone in the first place, and that kurusu is the first to match him. goro doesn't even know what his own profile looks like, and the thought is terrifying enough that he has to actively ignore it to function. ]

uh-huh

[maskreant]

[ Akira has kind of forgotten about the joke dating app profile he made thanks to the encouragement and "support" of his so-called friends. It comes to him as a surprise because he did had to deal with an influx of weird requests earlier that he would rather not recap, but... This one seems normal if it weren't for the name titled above the message.

Now this one is weirder than the rest. ]

You're single?

[ Forget himself, let's talk about Mister Dreamy Bachelor Most Likely To Succeed—Akechi Goro—messaging him via dating app. Akira poses this like a real, serious question, as if he doesn't already know. ]

[fellow]

Don't be cheeky.
This is one of your schemes, is it not?

[maskreant]

I'm flattered that you think I'm capable of cheating the dating app system and would go so far for a good kick, but I had no hand in it.

You see? Both hands up. 🙌

[fellow]

Kurusu, you cannot convince me that this match is coincidental.
Nevermind that. You never answered my question.

1/2

[maskreant]

Okay, it's fate.

[maskreant]

My friends put me up to it. Don't take it too seriously, please...

[fellow]

My curiosity stems that idea that you would need this app in the first place.
I would expect you would have people lining up to spend precious alone time with you.

[ ok, he may have been dated most-whatever according to the university's newpaper club, but that doesn't mean it carries any weight or has any bearings on his character as a whole. kurusu, however, with his natural charm and easy smile that curls at its corners like a mischievous cat—

kurusu is infuriatingly charismatic. he resents him for having that natural charisma where goro has to try very, very hard to keep his facade. ]

[maskreant]

[ ... How does he put this politely— ]

Are you jealous?

1/2

[fellow]

[ read: 10:58pm. ]

2/2

[fellow]

[ having ignored any attempts to get goro to talk in the last 24 hours, goro returns with a belated: ]

No.

[maskreant]

[ Oh, he didn’t expect Goro to respond back after earning his ire and being ignored for a whole day (rude). He was ready to put the topic aside and move on, but... Surprise surprise. Akira will try his best not to scare the other man off again. ]

We can always hang out. You only need to ask.

[fellow]

I don't need you to pity-date me, or whatever the hell that offer is.
I wasn't even meant to have this app, I saw your profile and was intrigued.
That's all.

1/2

[maskreant]

I, Kurusu Akira, a master of the silver tongue, purveyor of the time honored arts, a man who defies expectations, entreat you swipe right. My talents include knowing the right thing to say at the most opportune time, and I am certain to leave your heart aflame.

My passions include brewing coffee, and wordsmithery (or puns, whichever you prefer).

I am certain to be a lover like no other.

[maskreant]

It’s kind of hard to take that as an answer considering you were trying to match up with someone.

[fellow]

I told you, Kurusu, this app suddenly appeared on my phone.
Not that I would be able to convince you at this point.
Believe what you will.

[maskreant]

Did the app also suddenly open up, start matchmaking, and forced you to message me?

[ Not accusing, but if he knows what exactly happened, then he can maybe connect the dots and talk to a certain techy gremlin. ]

don't look at me........

[fellow]

I can admit that curiosity got the better of me, and nothing more.
If you want to continue this conversation for whatever reason, text me on my cell number.

[ he's serious - goro deletes the app as soon as he exits and -

finds himself anticipating a text? ]

i am looking

[maskreant]

[ ... Akira blinks slowly as he looks at his phone. Goro is actually expecting him to continue the conversation? Via text this time? Something about it, whether perceived arrogance or cheekiness, makes Akira want to defy him.

So he refrains from texting for maybe an hour or two. It would be rude to ignore him for a whole day, despite how Akira is familiar with being at the end of that kind of treatment himself. Nevertheless, Akira isn’t like Goro. ]

Your profile is still up on the app.

[fellow]

[ goro just about chucks his phone when the text arrives. little shit. ]

And why were you looking, Kurusu?

[maskreant]

[ Pot calling the kettle black!!! ]

Just curious.

You chose a nice picture even though you didn’t really write a bio.

[fellow]

[ shhh. ]

Stop looking.

[maskreant]

But it’s right there? I need to properly check my match and all.

[fellow]

We couldn't be more opposite.
Certainly, even I can admit that you excel in ways in which will always be incomprehensible to me - therefore, I forever loathe you for it.

[ he "loathes" you. ]

Besides, I'm sure you have many more legitimate matches. Call it a glitch in the system and forget about this, Kurusu.